Excuse my potty mouth (pun intended), but today, we’re talking shit. Literally. Not behind your back. Actual poop. Normally a taboo subject, we’re getting down and dirty with #2. …Don’t mind me dumping this on you, hanging with the Doody Free Girl has me all gassed up. OKAY I’LL STOP NOW.
Toilet humor aside, colonics are something that have always piqued my interest, and so when THE Doody Free Girl asked me to come in to her Brunswick Center office in Jersey City and try one out, I just had to oblige. Before we get into the treatment, I sat down with Jen Gonzalez, aka Doody Free Girl (such a catchy name, eh?) to discuss what a gravity-fed colonic is, and a little bit about how her business came to be.
^Jen, the adorable Doody Free Girl!
HG: Tell me about your experience with colonics!
Doody Free Girl: I’ve been receiving colonics for almost ten years. I received my colon Hydrotherapist certification from the Wood Hygienic Institute in 2009 and have been administering gravity-fed colonics ever since. I founded Doody Free Girl in 2012 in an effort to erase the stigma surrounding women and their basic human right to take a dump.
I founded Doody Free Girl in 2012 in an effort to erase the stigma surrounding women and their basic human right to take a dump.
I am constantly learning from my clients about the daily physical and emotional struggles involved in accomplishing this critical bodily function. Obstacles include anything from extra loopy intestines to office stage fright. Doody Free Girl serves as both a physical and a virtual refuge for those suffering from either physical or emotional constipation because ultimately, constipation can become a source of depression, anxiety and illness.
^The seat inside DFG’s office
HG: What got you into colonics?
DFG: I picked up Natalia Rose’s book called “The Raw Food Detox Diet,” which really drove home the theory that waste equals weight. The book stresses the importance of colonics when one decides to adopt a healthier lifestyle because detoxification can only come from the physical elimination of toxins. A diet rich in fiber and water-containing foods cleanse the system and actually primes more of the dormant waste that has been collected in the intestines — to be disposed of. This excess waste can discourage healthy eating as it may cause lethargy and bloating when not eliminated in a timely manner. Colonics have definitely helped me stay on track, encouraging healthy habits.
HG: What’s the most interesting part of your job {besides talking about shit all day}?
DFG: The most interesting part of my job is seeing the connection between the bowels and the rest of the body. Norman Walker, who founded the cold press method of extracting vegetable juice, always believed that health begins in the colon. I have clients who experience less anxiety, less resentment, fewer migraines, less pressure in behind their eyes (yes, that is actually a real testimonial!), and general sense of well-being and lightness afterward.
^Some of her poop-inspired decor
HG: What are the biggest myths about colonics?
DFG: #1 is colon perforation. Colonics and colonoscopies (the doctor-led medical procedure) get confused all the time. Unless one has a history of diverticulosis or colon perforation from obstruction or unrelated causes, there have been very few cases (if any!) of colon perforation resulting from colonics. You have a much higher risk of colon perforation from a colonoscopy. People are concerned with colonics wiping out all of their good bacteria. While some good bacteria gets washed away, it is important to understand that nutrient absorption happens in the small intestine, and the colonic only deals with the large intestine (your body’s septic tank, in a nutshell). A colonic does not reach your small intestine, but clears out everything your small intestine discarded.
HG: What are some health perks to colonics?
DFG: More energy, clearer skin, less anxiety, less bloat, and faster metabolism.
HG: Why should people get colonics?
DFG: As a society, we are chronically constipated. Many diseases and ailments have been traced back to constipation, even breast cancer. Your colon is responsible for extracting water from its contents, ultimately resulting in feces. The longer crap sits in your colon, the more crap will be reabsorbed into your bloodstream, causing a host of other issues.
HG: Is there anyone who should NOT get a colonic?
DFG: While colonics are amazing for many people, the following people are deemed ineligible unless approved by a doctor: anyone with colon cancer, kidney disease/dialysis, renal failure or insufficiency, cirrhosis of the liver, anemia (severe), aneurysm, carcinoma, cardiac disease, hypertension (uncontrolled), Crohn’s disease, congestive heart failure, diverticulitis (acute), fissures/fistulas, GI hemorrhage/perforation, hemorrhoids (excessive bleeding present), herniation, prostatitis, recent abdominal surgery (last six months), tumors, and ulcerative colitis. Also, pregnant women unless they’d been getting colonics regularly before getting pregnant.
Chatting with Jen about her business, it’s clear she is passionate about what she does. And if her poop-inspired office decor isn’t enough to relax you, then Jen herself certainly will. You can tell by her emails to her clients (and Instagram) that she’s totally obsessed with poop, and doesn’t give a shit (pun intended) who knows it. Loves it.
Now, about the colonic treatment:
Before my treatment, Jen and I chatted about the procedure and she sent over pre-colonic requirements. Basically, don’t eat 12-24 hours beforehand so that your system will be fully cleared by gravity-fed colonic.
The treatment takes about 45 minutes from start to finish. FYI, it’s not like the infamous Kim and Kourtney K scene (we all remember that…I won’t share any more details). You’re alone with Jen, in her clean, sanitary office, and she’s there throughout the entire thing.
^Inside the treatment room
Yes there’s a tube involved, no it doesn’t hurt, and yes it’s a bit of a compromising position. But, don’t let a little bit of butterflies in your stomach deter you. Jen chats casually, massages your stomach, and applies a warm compress to make you feel calm while your internal spring cleaning takes place. Dare I say it’s relaxing? That might be taking it too far. But it really wasn’t bad at all!
Post-Treatment Feelings?
Truthfully, I felt lighter, happier, and ready to relax for the rest of the weekend. Definitely clear your schedule (although Jen said some of her clients come to her for a colonic on a lunch break!). After the procedure, Jen recommends having some fresh green juice, coconut water (for hydration), and lots of water in general. You can slowly start to introduce solid foods later on that day, but it’s important to stay away from dairy and meat for at least 24 hours. And keeping a toilet nearby isn’t a bad thing either. Jen shared that depending on your digestive track, you may need to do your business a few more times that day.
And just when you thought you’d had enough shit for one day – Jen’s office is filled with toilet paper and other poop-inspired knick knacks. She really does a great job with marketing, if I do say so myself (and don’t even get me started on her Instagram memes). Hilarious.
This post isn’t sponsored, BTW, I just really enjoyed the experience and wanted to share about an off-the-beaten-path treatment. But don’t take my word for it — Jen’s clients’ testimonials speak for themselves!
Have you ever had a colonic with the Doody Free Girl? What did you think?
